| Are you a prospective student? Because I'd like to tell you all about the various activities and clubs I can offer. | |
| Are you Cornell? Because I saw that you have an Ithaca area code and that's where Cornell is located. | |
| Are you Harvard? Because I know I've got no chance with you. | |
| Are you my future roommate? Because I just can't stop talking to you online and I'm so excited for us to move in together. Then we'll get really annoyed with each other. But then we'll probably either be friends for life or never talk to each other again. There won't be a middle ground. | |
| Are you the new school janitor? Because you just swept me off my feet. | |
| Are you the SATs? Because I would gladly sit in a room with you for six hours. | |
| Are you the second semester of my senior year? Because I am so happy I survived long enough to see you. | |
| Are you the tuition at my dream school? Because I do not think my parents will approve of you (which makes it all the hotter). | |
| Being that beautiful just isn't equitable! | |
| Did it hurt when you fell from Heaven University? And do you know what their minimum GPA requirement is? | |
| Did we have any homework due? | |
| Do these flowers expiate the fact that I've been stalking you? | |
| Do you believe in adventitious love or do I have to walk by again? | |
| Do you have a pen I could borrow? | |
| Do you have any you'd like to add? | |
| Does your college of choice need a reference letter about how beautiful you are? Because if they do I can write that letter. | |
| Don’t walk into the building. The sprinklers will go off | |
| Even if there were no gravity on earth, i'd still fall for you | |
| Everytime I hear yoour voice it reverberates within my soul. | |
| Girl don't repudiate me, I'm a nice guy. | |
| Girl, it's axiomatic that you're absolutely gorgeous! | |
| Hey baby i got the F the C and the K all i need is U | |
| Hey baby, just call me Jay-Z, because I'm pretty sure I'll be able to get into whatever college I want if they think I'm Jay-Z. | |
| Hey girl, are you my guidance counselor? Because I really hope you are. I got to a big school and haven't been able to find her office. | |
| Hey, I saw you cheer last Friday at the football game. When is the next home game going to be? | |
| How can i know so many hundreds of digits of pi and not the 7 digits of your phone number? | |
| I can infer from the way you're looking at me that you'll be coming back to my place tonight! | |
| I can infer that you are smart enough to go out with me. | |
| I commiserate with all the other girls in the room because they have to compete with someone as beautiful as you! | |
| I didn't know angels were allowed in public schools. | |
| I don't know how I'll ever get to class on time when it's so easy to get lost in your eyes. | |
| I don’t know how I’ll ever get to class on time when it’s so easy to get lost in your eyes | |
| I filled out the admission form except for the phone number part. Can I have yours? | |
| I give you A plus for the outfit | |
| I gotta say that the amorphous dress does nothing to show off your fabulous figure. | |
| I hear they banned you from school lunches for being so sweet. | |
| I hear you're good at algebra. Can you replace my x without asking y? | |
| I heard you were in [so and so's] class. My class sucks, so I'm thinking about transferring in there if I can. How is it? | |
| I hope this campus has a great medical center, because I broke my arm falling for you. | |
| I hope your dating policy is rolling admission, since I'd like to know whether we can go out as soon as possible! | |
| I know summer must be over, because you're about to fall for me. | |
| I know you're noncommittal about comming home with me, so maybe i'll just get you drunk so we can turn that into a yes! | |
| I missed class last time, do you have the notes? | |
| I need some answers for my math homework. Quick. What's your number? | |
| I would apply for an early decision from you, because if you say yes, I don't care what anyone else says. | |
| I would fill out four whole pages of supplemental materials just to have a chance to be with you. | |
| I would have my wealthy great-grandfather build a wing of a library in your name if it would do anything for my chances. | |
| I would lie about the number of extracurricular activities I've taken part in just to get a chance with you. | |
| I'd like to organize a campus visit to see if we might be compatible. | |
| I'd pick you over a thick envelope any day. | |
| I'm going to blazon my love for you all over town. | |
| I'm learning about important dates in history. Wanna be one of them? | |
| I'm not being obtuse, but you're acute girl | |
| If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put U and I together. Because I'm hoping to get into U of I. | |
| If I told you you had a nice body, would you write me a recommendation letter? | |
| If I were writing an essay on your beauty, I wouldn't need to double-space or increase the margin sizes to satisfy the minimum page requirement. | |
| If you were a pencil, I wouldn't be able to use you to take the SATs, because you're no number 2, you're my number 1! | |
| If you were erudite you'd let me buy you a drink. | |
| Is that a cell phone in your pocket or are you just affable? | |
| Is there a science classroom nearby, or am I just sensing the chemistry between me and you? | |
| Is your father the dean of a major school? Because if so, please put in a good word for me. | |
| It doesn't take an erudite scholar to know dat you are hot! | |
| It's inscrutable that God was able to let you out of heaven baby. | |
| My love for you is irrevocable. | |
| Our first date will be like an alumni interview, because I will be desperately trying to figure out the right thing to say. | |
| Seeing your beautiful face makes my smile agrandize. | |
| Stop being querulous and just sleep with me. | |
| That gossamer shirt you're wearing makes it really easy to see what color bra you're wearing. | |
| Those pectoral muscles are so hot they should be contraband. | |
| Watching you walk into the room has put me in a state of ferment. | |
| What'd you think of that test? | |
| Why don't we go upstairs so I can acculturate myself with your body. | |
| Will you be my student loans? Because I'd like to have you around for the rest of my life. | |
| You have the propensity for taking my breath away. | |
| You must be a high test score, because I want to take you home and show you to my mother. | |
| You must be a very important textbook passage, because seeing you is the highlight of my day. | |
| You must be the square root of two because i feel irrational around you | |
| You should be warned, I have the propensity for getting girls to come home with me! | |
| You're a perfect 1600. (A perfect 36 in the Midwest.) | |
| You're a perfect Big Ten. | |
| You're like an SAT practice test, because I keep wanting to start over. | |
| You're like the AP physics exam—great curves. | |
| You're like the common app, because I can't imagine how much worse my life would be without you. | |
| You're like the SATs, because you dominate my Saturdays. | |
| You're looking A-grade tonight! | |
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